Working in a startup

It's one of the most overwhelming decisions one has to make: do I join a startup or do I just take the trodden, safe path and work for an established name?

Years and years of studying and working for someone, doing tiny jobs here and there, haggling with sellers, being the hated seller yourself; all those years of industrial training, soft-skill development programs, employability programs, and unending sessions of personality development do not lighten this burdensome decision any more than a dropping leaf relieves a colossal pine tree. At some point, one would assume, there would be a bright glow at the end of the tunnel, a shimmer, a ray of hope... some metaphorical bulb glowing over your head, something!

Nothing.

You finish your graduation, you dive headlong into uncharted territory: being out on your own. Suddenly, every time your parents say "What are you doing now?" there seems to be a tinge of anger to it. Nobody seems to offer help anymore; many of them are actually out to get you. Suddenly, that pani puri you bought your friend is always in the corner of your mind; do I ask him to pay me back, or do I let it go? Your girlfriend starts planning marriage, introducing you to her parents and at the end of the conversation, there's always the "GET A JOB! How can I marry you when you can't provide me any safety?"

A mute reply.

You go out with your friends, you say "screw all this! I'm just gonna go chill out with my bros! They'll always be there for me!" to yourself. You ride to the same place you've been going to since before you started your graduate course. You park at the same spot for the zillionth time, order the same thing you've been ordering since the beginning of time; at this point, the shopkeeper already knows what your next order is. Familiarity gives you great comfort, it's all the happiness you'll feel for the next few hours. But not to be. The prodigal friend who used to be your best buddy until he got responsible and "drifted away" decides to turn up along with a full-time member. You stare at him, agape, aghast, "What horror! What has your job turned you into?!" Never did he seem more repulsive to you. You don't extend any more than a casual handshake or bro hug before retracting back into your shell of loathing and contempt. then people ask him questions about his job, he narrates fascinating stories of fun and merrymaking. After a long while of good banter, it's time to leave. He pays for everybody. You're shocked. "Damn! This guy couldn't even pay for his own cigarette earlier! Look at him now!" You've had enough of this. You go home to the same nagging about the roof that can't be fixed because your dad doesn't work anymore: an indirect jab at your unemployment.

Stung, yet unfazed.

Your girlfriend calls. It's about that guy her parents like again. Ignore, ignore, ignore.

Your third month of having nothing to do. Your friends are starting to get married, moving to faraway shores, and taking with them all your dreams of a glorious life full of good-old friends and jolly times. Life is cruel, you tell yourself. But the greatest injury happens when your best friend jumps on the "employed" bandwagon. It's not much, but he's getting a decent salary. Soon, he'll be able to pay for your smokes and drinks. You cry heresy. But everybody only hears jealousy. Oh, this cruel, cruel world! Everybody just wants to pull you down to their level. But you're better than all of them! Oh yes, you are; because your mother once said so. That was a decade ago, but so what? I'm still better than them. I can make my own destiny! I can't sit in a cubicle and work on a metal box full of wires and codes.

Google! That's it! I can work for Google! they don't have cubicles there, nor do they have a functional hierarchy of people in charge; insubordination is not a problem there! YES! This is my big break! I'm sure Google is in desperate need of people like me. People with my skill set: ability to sit cross-legged in front of the TV for hours on end. My dad once called it a record, I must be hot property! I don't even need a resume, I just show up and people hire me! So much happiness! Time for a smoke.

Same old cocktail of tobacco and whining. That unending saga of ineptness and complete and utter unemployability.

You get an offer! "That's it, this is my big break!" It's for a startup that's offered to pay you a little over bare minimum. Fret not, others will come your way; you're a gem in the dark! You're a firework, waiting for the metaphorical spark. You're a golden orb in the middle of nowhere.

But days of persuasion and blackmail later, you join that startup. You feel like a construction worker; abused, exploited and underpaid beyond words. Dreary days lie ahead, you're sure of it. First day at work, you realize you're actually amid a vibrant bunch of people: a budding entrepreneur (the guy who started the company), an aspiring photographer, a savage opportunist, a listless nincompoop who you're not quite sure about. Days are actually pretty fun, everybody extends a helping hand, everybody seems to come to your rescue when something goes wrong, everybody wants you to succeed, because in your success lie their successes. sharing a laugh is always permitted, fooling around is encouraged... as long as you get your stuff done. There's a sense of communal belonging, a feeling of being connected to everybody around you; this sensation of being part of a secret cult operating out of a shanky tent in a top-secret bunker.

"This isn't half bad!" Of course it's not! Working for a startup is the best thing that can happen to your career. You get to realize your strengths, work on them; rectify your weaknesses, build a stronger, sturdier you in the face of constant change and overwhelming vulnerability. But this vulnerability creates the need to adapt, and fight for survival. You grow stronger through exposure to incendiary events; not through careful grooming and sensitization. You don't hear of any lactose-intolerant babies in Somalia, do you? Strife is the word, my fellow beings.

"So, how does it feel to work for a startup?" You tell me!

I originally published this article on India.CD, but the unreliability of their servers meant that I had to store it with more responsible people, and who better than the folks over at Blogger? Also, I'm publishing a lot of the drafts that I'd kept aside. Have fun!